I need to get my excitement out somehow. Nobody’s online to rant to,
so I’ll do it here. I’ll say it again, Saw II is in-fucking-credible.
If you have seen the first one, then you too were absolutely amazed at
the ending. Biggest fucking plot twist ever. Saw II’s ending is 8
BILLION TIMES bigger. In a nod towards its predecessor, Saw II featured
a scene in the dingy bathroom of the first one, complete with the
rotting and decomposing corpses of Zep and Adam (of the old movie). I’m
getting ahead of myself. Let’s start with the basic synopsis of the
The movie opens with a man, by the name of Michael, sitting in a
chair, with a “death mask” around his neck, and an incredibly wounded
eye. The familiar creepy clown on the television appears and tells him
that he must find a key to open the death mask before the timer on the
back of the mask stops ticking…and snaps the mask shut. “Where’s the
key?” you ask? IN HIS FUCKING EYE SOCKET. Ol’ Michael finds a knife in
a box, and lo and behold he is faced with the task of CUTTING OPEN HIS
OWN FUCKING EYE to find the key. Michael fails. *cue mask snapping
shut, and Michael’s corpse falling to the ground in a bloody mess.*
This all occurs before the opening credits. Now onto the main fun.
The latest victims of Jigsaw (the serial killer behind every grisly
death) are actually a group of people trapped in a house. They have no
idea where they are. Nerve gas is being pumped through the air
ventilation, and they have 2 hours to find an antidote before blood
pours from their every orifice. OOOOOOH, so many fucking deaths ensue.
The COOLEST fucking deaths ensue. I shudder remembering some of
them. Some of them you just whisper to yourself “…Jesus”. I won’t go
spoiling them here, but rest assured that you will leave that theater
SCARRED. All of the people trapped in the house, are coincidentally
jail convicts, except one. A young troubled boy, who apparently is the
son of a police officer, who himself is watching his own son die. In
the whole thing, it is the police officer who is face to face with
Jigsaw, and who must try to figure out where his son is.
Suspense is there. Gore is there. Dread is there. “A” FUCKING PLUS.