I used to think that moods influenced the way songs felt but I think it’s the other way around now. For instance, this song used to tear me to fucking shreds and although it’s still incredible, its impact is now more like the thwack of a wooden ruler against a brick wall.
- shower sex is not easy.
- PMS is real.
- sex is a battle between physical exhaustion and actually orgasming.
- any dude grossed out by period sex is an idiot; it’s still sex, fucknuts.
- this relationship is making me reevaluate my last one, realize that even mild grudges are stupid, first loves are retarded and destined for tragedy, and that people will fuck other people and that’s actually totally fine.
On Friday, we went on an actual big person date. Dinner, drinks, and a movie. On a Friday night. Dating pioneers. That’s what we are. At the bar, I finally tried an Ardbeg 10 year old. It’s creamy, peaty and fucking delicious scotch. Afterwards we went to see Gravity in 3D. Pretty great movie. Sandra Bullock and George Clooney were excellent, and the special effects were just mind boggling. As Chris Livingston put it: “I’m pretty sure they shot it in actual outer space.”
On Saturday, we went for a walk on the causeway. It’s a 4 mile trail cutting straight across an enormous lake with spectacular views of islands and picturesque mountains on both sides. It’s also 4 miles. Which meant that we walked 8 miles round trip just all willy nilly. My legs were barking that night and much of the next morning.
The other night, the following happened:
“Hey, can I ask you a question?”
“Are we together?”
This talk was inevitable. We’ve been dating about a month. I replied in the affirmative. We hung out all the time already doing couple-y things and we slept at each others places constantly. So I guess we’re official now. Boyfriend and girlfriend. Another girl to call “babe”. Hm.
Sleeping next to another person is hard. I don’t really understand why. Well, I guess random boners don’t help, but those are transient. We both wake up and fall asleep several times a night. Guess it’s just something to get used to.
My new job is going. Not well. But it’s going. The problem is that this pharmacy is the epitome of ineptitude and inefficiency. They never finish the day’s work. That work rolls over into the next day, so now the people working the next day are filling scripts from the day before as well as their current load. As a result, that day’s work doesn’t get done. It’s a vicious cycle perpetuated by inaccurate wait times and staff inefficiency. I don’t largely give a fuck because for me this is just a job that pays really really well. So well in fact, that I really wanted to cash today’s check in gold coins and go all Scrooge McDuck on it.
Man, people get so boring when they’re happy. I’m just content right now. We go out, we fuck, we watch TV, we fuck, we make out, we fuck. I barely get 3 or 4 hours of sleep when we spend the night. It’s awesome, but exhausting. I actually need to nap the next day to recuperate.
My big stupid three kilogram brain thinks about the future and how long things can last this well, since all relationships have honeymoon periods and shit gets real sooner or later.
I should be starting training for the new pharmacy tech job tomorrow. It is a tech position, and so I won’t be able to counsel or do any of the shit I’ve been doing as an intern since 2010, but I don’t care. I need money.