Bad news, internet. After an agonizing month of waiting, I got word that my industry fellowship plans didn’t pan out. Nothing was guaranteed, and I guess the odds were just not in my favor. It’s a little sad. This was a Boston based company, and I was really looking forward to spending 2 years not only living in an awesome city, but also not having to worry about a big boy job. Life, however, decided to shit on my plans, and so here I am.
For the first time in my life, I’m somewhat directionless. I’ve always had concrete goals that I was moving towards. In high school, I knew I wanted to go to pharmacy school. 3 years of undergrad later, I got in. Once I got in, I knew I had to finish the first 3 years and get out on rotations to see what piqued my interest in the world of pharmacy. Once I was on rotation, I discovered that I really liked the idea of industry and so the next goal was to go to Florida to interview for fellowship positions. There, I interviewed with an exciting company that took an interest me and asked me to apply to be selected for a final interview. Now that that hasn’t panned out, I suddenly feel unsure what I should do with my life. I mean, I have a loose Plan B, but for the first time in my life, I have nothing tangible or concrete to work towards.
I don’t know where I want to work. I don’t know where I want to live. Things have never been quite so up in the air and unpredictable, which is unsettling for me because I’m the kind of person that likes to have as much under control as possible. I at least prefer to know the outcome, even if I can’t affect it.
All I can do is take things one day at a time now. I need a little bit of serendipity in my life.